DZHABER

a rock album of one obsession.

18 tracks on what it feels like to be on your knees before a woman - with your body, soul, and heart.

“SALTY SADNESS” by DZHABER

TRACKLIST:

1. Into you
2. Paparazzi
3. Kiss my scars
4. This f*cking sex
5. Still love you
6. In bed with the boss
7. Put on the collar
8. Craving for you
9. Reckless jealousy
10. Burn for you
11. I love you, do you hear me?
12. Subordinate
13. No turning back
14. Pain.Pain.Pain
15. FOREVER MINE
16. Say my name
17. I'll be falling
18. I remember her

Spotify: open.spotify.com/album/6U5b8vHnEoVzykbCRu8Srs?si=W…

Youtube Music: music.youtube.com/playlist?li...

Apple Music: music.apple.com/ru/album/salty-sadness/6771271350

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1 week ago | [YT] | 188

DZHABER

🔥 THE FIRST LESBIAN PHONK ALBUM IN THE WORLD

Not a single. A WHOLE ALBUM.
24 TRACKS.

While part of the world still thinks women’s love is a quiet whisper,
we prove that it’s loud like a force of nature!

THIS HAS NEVER EXISTED. UNTIL THIS MOMENT. ✖️✖️✖️

This is the FIRST full-length Phonk album in the world entirely about women loving women.

📀 FEELING AVENUE — DZHABER & OPEXX

In three languages, because passion knows no borders:

ENGLISH
PORTUGUÊS
POLSKI

From Warsaw to São Paulo.
From the bedroom to the car.
From YouTube to every streaming platform in the world.

WE DIDN’T WANT TO BE THE FIRST. BUT SOMEONE HAD TO START!

Modern music must exist about women, especially in PHONK!

LISTEN NOW:
open.spotify.com/album/6DcdvyGWitUuTyjOJgNdqN?si=J…

⚠️ If you love PHONK - you need to hear this.
⚠️ If you love women - even more so.
⚠️ If you also love driving to hard-hitting music - welcome.

TRACKLIST
1. don’t kiss me like that — DZHABER, OPEXX
2. loved by me — DZHABER, OPEXX
3. drunk on love — DZHABER, OPEXX
4. my mania — DZHABER, OPEXX
5. devil loves roses — DZHABER, OPEXX
6. in my mind — DZHABER, OPEXX
7. want you bad — DZHABER, OPEXX
8. you’re my girl — DZHABER
9. wolf fell for the lamb — DZHABER, OPEXX
10. break me slow — DZHABER, OPEXX
11. w moje serce — DZHABER, OPEXX
12. clothes on the floor — DZHABER
13. me mata — DZHABER, OPEXX
14. i grab her close — DZHABER, OPEXX
15. in your body — DZHABER
16. in love now — DZHABER (feat. OPEXX)
17. my little thorn — DZHABER
18. kill me, kill — DZHABER, OPEXX
19. senhorita dominador — DZHABER
20. lose my mind — DZHABER
21. stain yourself with me — DZHABER, OPEXX
22. twoje imię rana — DZHABER, OPEXX
23. no way out — DZHABER (feat. OPEXX)
24. paralyzed by you — DZHABER

1 month ago | [YT] | 300

DZHABER

“what worries you worries me”

Arisa can make plans. can play roles. can convince her uncle, convince everyone around her that it is revenge, that it is cold calculation, that Lalin is just a piece on her board of revenge.
but she cannot convince her own eyes. and every time I look into those eyes I see one thing fear of loss. so animal, so old, that it lives in her deeper than any plan, deeper than any mask.

she herself sometimes does not notice in herself how she looks. how she hugs her while she sleeps. how she presses closer. how in a rush of tenderness she kisses her face, not leaving a single free centimeter. this is the real Arisa. not dangerous. not cold. just a woman who holds what she is afraid to lose.

remember how she came back for Lalin in the second episode. and it was not a plan. it was that pain in the chest that cannot be ignored. it was fear what if I lose her.

she lost her parents. and inside her lives an Arisa who still cannot get through it. and everything she does boxing, shooting, revenge, armor this is not aggression. this is protection. protect yourself. protection of those love. she cannot allow herself to stand again and watch someone of her own leave.

she tells herself that Lalin is part of the plan.
but inside she is her little girl. hers.

she plays with everyone. sometimes even overplays like in the restaurant. but then moments of such piercing tenderness come that the plan crumbles into dust. and she herself feels it. and it hurts her because of that.

the mind says one thing. the heart another. and the eyes the eyes just love. and it is they that keep her from doing something irreparable.

they call her heartless. but the heartless do not risk themselves for others. the heartless do not come back. the heartless do not hold a sleeping person so tenderly.

she takes revenge not out of hatred. she takes revenge because back then she could not protect. and now she protects them at least like this. protects their honor, their pain, their memory. does what the little girl did not manage to do.

and with all of this she loves. with all this huge heart that she hides so carefully.
and I do not believe that those eyes will be able to destroy the one they love. I do not believe.

and yes, my soundtrack to this series is already on the channel with a clip "Lose My Mind - DZHABER"

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1 month ago | [YT] | 1,070

DZHABER

Album “HEARTBREAKER” is already out 💔

The Heartbreaker is already on Spotify and YouTube Music, and it will be available on all other platforms within 24 hours.
You’ve been waiting for so long. I know. There’s an album with OPEXX coming up. And yes, I haven’t forgotten about the rock tracks, I know how much you miss them. Everything will be there, my lovelies, just wait a little longer.

«HEARTBREAKER» TRACKLIST:
1. Drame brûlant
2. Let me touch you
3. Your perfume
4. Saint Valentine’s Day
5. Drown with me
6. I always love you
7. Still I’m on my own
8. Kiss me while I’m drunk
9. Arrow in my heart
10. Collar on, kneel down
11. Command me
12. Don’t be mad
13. I wanna love again
14. Mon amour!
15. You’re my, my, my
16. I’m afraid to love
17. My dark paradise
18. In your mind
19. You loved me
20. Pocałuj mnie
21. You wanna take me

1 month ago | [YT] | 325

DZHABER

she decided to cross her out and left. no fight. no explanation.
just crossed her out. and that's it.
and you know what's the strangest thing.
we became strangers, but i still know how she acts
when things are bad. i know how she laughs when something is genuinely funny. i know how she
tries to be strong, but what's happening inside her in that moment. i know her habits,
fears and thoughts at night. i know her completely.
and for her i am nobody.

there are mornings like that.
you wake up and it’s warm. quiet. an ordinary morning.
and then you remember. and a gray film covers your eyes.
and you fall. every time like the first. and you lie there, not moving,
and wait until the first wave passes. and it passes. and you get up. go brush
your teeth. make coffee.
you live.
you learn to breathe with a hole inside. you go around it. you stop
looking at it. one day you notice it seems easier. seems like you’re coping.
you meet someone. good. who looks at you so
gently.
and with your whole body you try to want this person. but inside
there is only one thing:
not that.
not that voice.
not that smile.
not that look when you look at her photos.
not that feeling next to you when you’re ready
to do foolish things for her.
just. not. that.

you get tired of the comparison that goes on by itself without asking, without stopping. because she is already there where you don’t even tell close ones. deep. in the quietest place.

and then… she comes back.
you stand there and feel your chest tighten.
the body knows before the mind.
before the resentment.
before everything you told yourself all this time.

Prim forgives her.
not immediately and not because the pain is gone. the pain didn’t go anywhere
here it is, living in the same place, it didn’t leave. but Prim looks at her and chooses her together with the pain.
because love turned out to be bigger.

there is such a thing.
when a person is so yours that their absence has a shape. literally. you feel their mood at a distance you know when they hurt, when you don’t communicate, you feel it to the depth of your soul. and no other person is felt by you like that.

and when i look at this last scene in episode 4
my eyes sting.
from the fact that love can survive in silence. survive other people.
all attempts to forget. all the mornings when you fall back into this.
and still stand.
this is what it is. real love is not when it’s easy and not when everything happened at the right moment.
it’s when you choose at the most wrong time, through everything, again and as paradoxical as it sounds, my new song (your perfume - DZHABER) which is already on the channel is written from the perspective of Prim and Bambi, but in
fact it fits much more another pair Min and Praew.
between Prim and Bambi it felt more like quiet pain, acceptance, careful attempts to save something. but in the other pair you feel that very spark, passion, tension.
at first it seems like a light story, but in fact behind
it there are difficult decisions, mistakes. it reminds that any relationships should not
be romanticized.
i think in context you will understand what i mean.

and finally i want to say an important thing about life.
despite the fact that in the series Bambi returned to Prim, in real life such stories happen extremely rarely. most often people from the past return not in order to start everything again, but so that we finally close an unfinished lesson. and

everyone has their own.

sometimes life really gives a second chance. but in general returning to past relationships rarely leads to something good only
if both people have grown, worked on themselves and really look in one direction.

therefore you should not romanticize the past and sacrifice yourself,
your life, your youth waiting for someone. i understand how painful it
can be to act, to achieve and to feel that this is the one person,
but not to understand why life pulls you in different directions.

maybe that is the lesson. sometimes it is
to learn to live with this emptiness, not filling it with someone, but gradually finding joy in simple things. and over time you notice you smile more often, laugh at small things, there is more light around and less grayness. you come out of this state already filled from within, and your mood does not depend on others.

and then when you become whole, life can again
bring you together with a person from the past to check how much you have changed, how much you value yourself. so that you do not return to the same pain.
because your inner peace must be protected.

if someone comes back, it is important not to give in to emotions, but to see has the person really changed? did they come with good intentions? or can it destroy you again?

love is a strong feeling. and the stronger it is, the more painfully it can hurt.

but no matter how hard it is, no matter how many scars remain in the soul you need to move on.
and if you are truly meant to be together in life, if there is something real between you, you will find your way to it regardless. but not at the cost of waiting a lifetime.

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1 month ago | [YT] | 865

DZHABER

Warning! A cautionary story about the theft of my music.

Recently, one person made a very unfortunate decision. They took five of my tracks directly from YouTube, in low quality, with compression artifacts, and uploaded them to streaming platforms through a distributor under their own name. Obviously they were counting on earning money from my work, or believing that the copyright now belonged to them.

Wrong on both counts.

How it actually works.
I spend an enormous amount of time on every track. What goes up on YouTube is not the final version for streaming. Before publishing on platforms I refine every track: I improve the quality, check for errors, perform additional adjustments if I consider it necessary, and optimize everything to meet streaming standards. Just uploading a video to YouTube while preserving maximum quality through the most demanding codec takes me 3 to 4 hours for one video with one track. And that is without the editing, the track creation itself, and all the preparation before the creation process even begins. This is systematic, serious work. I spend an enormous amount of time on this, sometimes sleeping only 4 to 5 hours a day when there are many projects running at once. And this month I am simultaneously preparing a new album for release. A whole month, do you understand, because many tracks require a great deal of work before they are ready to be published.
And then someone took the result of all that work by downloading it with compression artifacts and put their own name on it. I consider this not merely a violation. It is a reflection of a mindset I have no intention of tolerating.

What happened next?
I discovered the violation quickly. I reached out. I identified the distributor with no effort at all.
By the way, the content has been removed.

Now regarding the data. Anyone who registers with a distributor and withdraws money is required to provide their passport information. That is a mandatory condition of every legitimate platform. As you can imagine, the person has been identified. But I will not be writing about that just yet.
I am currently at the stage of preparing a lawsuit in the country where the violation was committed. This is not an emotional decision. It is a deliberate and justified step.

I have a complete archive of every track: original project files, stems, MIDI files, demos, version histories, and documented creation dates. Copyright is established at the moment a work is created, not at the moment of registration, not at the moment of publication. From the moment of creation. And it is protected under international law regardless of which country the infringer is located in.
Even if someone had managed to get ahead of me with a publication through a distributor, that does not create authorship. It only creates evidence of a violation.

What awaits those who decide to repeat this?
Removal of content from all platforms. Financial penalties. Permanent account bans across all distributors tied to passport data. Legal prosecution in your country. Reputational consequences that do not disappear in this industry.
I am not making threats. I am describing a mechanism that is already in motion and will be set in motion again whenever necessary.
Music is not content sitting in open access waiting for someone to come along and take it.

Each track is the result of many hours, sacrificed sleep, and the uncompromising standards I hold myself to every day. That is not something you can download. Behind every track stands a specific person and specific authorship.

There is an old truth that never ages: think before you take what is not yours. It will cost you more than you are prepared to pay.

what you take without earning will never truly belong to you. It will only belong to the consequences that follow. The person who steals does not walk away richer. They walk away exposed, with a countdown they cannot see but cannot stop.

Cultivate the human within yourself.
Just as a gardener tends to a garden, tend to your own mind and actions. What you feed within yourself becomes your destiny over time.
Do not seek to take what belongs to others. It brings no peace. True value is born from labor, awareness, and inner honesty.
Learn, observe, try, and grow. Because only what is created by you, with clean intention, brings genuine satisfaction and stays with you.
And remember: a person becomes what they cultivate in their heart.

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2 months ago | [YT] | 409

DZHABER

What it’s really like to feel what happened in episode 5?

Breathing slows down not because it is calm but because there are too many feelings at once. Pupils dilate the world around swims slightly. You simultaneously want to run away and pray that she comes even closer.

Your eyes are shining as if you are drunk, but you are sober. The truth is that you are as if intoxicated not by wine but by her gaze. As if you drank through her eyes.
Your gaze lingers on her collarbone. Slowly rises higher. The throat tightens swallowing is difficult as if something heavy was placed on the chest. You try to breathe deeper to make it easier but it does not get easier. The closer she is the wider your pupils the hotter the breath becomes.
You begin to distinguish her scent. It envelops intoxicates like a warm summer evening by the sea. You want to inhale deeper. More. And more.
She touches your cheek.
And in that same second goosebumps. A warm wave descends down the spine soft electricity flashes in the lower abdomen. The skin becomes sensitive to the limit as if a protective layer was removed from you and every touch penetrates deeper even through clothes.
She approaches closer and you no longer understand how she is already kissing you.
And the world disappears. The senses sharpen many times over.
The heart beats deeper so that you begin to hear it.
Damn.
A touch of lips turns out can be so pleasant. The feeling is as if you are kissing for the first time in your life.
And you almost get scared by how pleasant it is.
"Am I really feeling this?"
The body is as if paralyzed not by fear but by pleasure. You want to slow down time stretch the second hold her lips on yours. But instead you freeze yourself.
Body temperature rises drops of sweat are already slowly flowing down the back and it is strange because it is cool around. The first sobriety covers when she pulls away. It immediately becomes empty in the chest. You want to instantly return her lips to feel so strongly again.
You touch her in return. First you carefully slide your palms along the waist. Then more greedily. As if you want to absorb her under the skin. Take. Appropriate. Keep inside yourself.
Thoughts dissolve. The body weakens.
She smells so pleasant it is almost impossible to endure.
Her skin is delicate so that it is as if you are giving yourself a massage with your fingertips. You move your fingers carefully as if you are afraid to break her like a fragile vase. And in this care passion is already hiding.
Tenderness and desire intertwine and you feel how you become more obsessed. She responds with the same she touches you and a desire flashes inside to squeeze harder hold not let go.
"I will not give her to anyone" you do not notice how these thoughts already appear in the mind.
The feeling is as if you are being drowned from within. The heart thunders. Palms are damp. The gaze becomes glassy clouded.
She stops for a second to look at you. And you understand if she stops now you will die from a complete stop.
But she pulls you to her again. Sharply. Bites the lip.
And butterflies explode inside no longer gentle but frantic. You respond stronger press her closer.
And suddenly a ring. As if you were doused with an icy shower. Reality invades sharply almost rudely. You are forced to pull away. But the feeling of fullness remains as if you are full for the first time in your life. And simultaneously even hungrier.
You try to look calm. Pretend that everything is fine. But as soon as she looks again current runs through the body.
The gaze becomes deeper. Quieter. Darker.
Saying goodbye is unbearable. You want to stick to her forever. But life does not stop. You have things to do.
You take her hand one last time as if you want to absorb the residual warmth. But instead you just slowly stroke it. And leave.
And as soon as the first free minute appears you relive this kiss again. You do not notice how you smile. And you try to hide this smile even from yourself. Afraid to believe. Afraid to scare it away.
Friends ask why the eyes shine.
You just smile easily and remain silent.
At night you turn on the hot water in the shower as if you hope to feel that temperature that touch again.
At night you hug the blanket but you want to hug her. Strongly.
And the realization comes: what you feared has happened.

***

I tried to put on paper what is impossible to express in words.
Is this feeling familiar when you want to literally sew a person under your skin? Or did it feel different for you?
If you want to feel the temperature of this story it is in my new video.
"don’t kiss me like that - DZHABER" on the channel.

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2 months ago | [YT] | 2,117

DZHABER

DZHABER IS BACK ON MUSIC STREAMING

The album Obsession is not just another one of my music releases. It is the answer to every one of your “when?”. To the screenshots with deleted tracks that you sent me. To the playlists with empty slots where my songs used to be. To those moments when you searched for me and could not find me.

These are 17 reasons to feel again.
17 of my answers to the word “why”.
17 of my returned songs.

But behind this return there is something bigger than just music.
I really might not have come back.

The previous distributor did not just remove my tracks. They blocked my accounts, three months of income simply disappeared. They hid the unique song numbers and metadata without which returning with another distributor turns into an almost impossible task. They put me on blacklists. And then I realized it is a scheme. They deliberately wait until an artist grows. And then they drop them. They withhold money. They hide behind accusations they are not even going to prove because it is a lie. Because there are many stories similar to mine that I found from other people. Because they have nothing to prove. Their accusations are a lie.
But I was left alone with this.

I told myself I am strong. I will handle it. It is just another obstacle.
But at the very first barriers I did not cope.
I lay there. I cried. I could not get up.
I told myself it will pass. But weeks went by and it did not get easier. I smiled and said “everything is fine” while at the same time something inside was slowly breaking. I listened to people’s dissatisfaction even though I knew it was not my fault. I kept pretending that I was okay until I no longer believed myself.

There were decisions waiting for me that had to be made. Compromises that had to be carried out. Again and again.
It is easy to talk about such things later when everything is behind you. But when you are inside it is unbearable.
And at some point it seemed to me that it would be easier to disappear. Completely.

But I did not disappear.

Because you did not let me do it.
With your faith that found me every time exactly when I was ready to give up. You held my hand without even knowing it. Without even realizing how tightly I was holding onto it.

And today I tell you something I rarely dare to say:
“Thank you for believing in me more than I believe in myself.”

This is only the beginning. It feels like I am being born again and I will be bringing the songs back gradually, the ones you are waiting for the most.

Write right under this post which tracks you want next. Let’s make a vote. Your voice matters and it is what moves me forward.

For now Obsession is already waiting for you on Spotify, YouTube Music and Deezer. And very soon it will appear on other platforms.
Turn it on.
Listen.
And if somewhere on Forgive Me, My Love or Eyes Never Lie your eyes start to sting
know that I cried when I was writing it too.

Obsession tracklist:

1. Slow Kiss
2. You Are Mine
3. Bite Me
4. Eyes Never Lie
5. Let Me In Your Heart
6. Loving You
7. How Do I Survive?
8. My World Stops
9. Sit On My Lap
10. Finally Love Me
11. Let Her
12. Come Back To Me
13. I Need You
14. Hold Me Tight
15. Brown Eyes, I’m Drowning
16. Forgive Me, My Love
17. Surrender To Me

2 months ago | [YT] | 596

DZHABER

Soundtrack to which new GL series would you like?

2 months ago | [YT] | 553

DZHABER

This button is my personal Oscar for not being afraid to be sincere. It is for daring to remain myself when the entire world was shouting: "Stop!"
Circumstances. Events. People.
"It’s not the right time," "you’re inconvenient," "you’re crazy," "what will people think?" and "think about your reputation!"

Yes, I was terrified. I understood how vital reputation is in the field of law. Six years of study. Sleepless nights over textbooks. I built my name and my future with persistence and diligence.
But everything turns upside down when you simply want fifty people, just fifty, to read your story. For people who cannot find anything like it here.
My lesbian novels. Some of the first in a country at war. In a place where people are already afraid of anything unfamiliar. I just wanted my creative soul to breathe somewhere, even if only in fifty copies.
Instead, thousands read them.

I froze before a choice that tore me apart: creativity or law. A dream or stability. Heart or mind.

I chose my heart.
I thought it was the right thing to do. I thought that if I listened to myself, everything would fall into place. But no one tells you that choosing yourself is painful. That it is even more terrifying. That you will fall so hard you won't be able to get back up.
At one point, that happened.
We launched a massive print run of my second novel. We invested all our money, all our hopes, and all our strength.

The sales were a disaster.
There was a war. People were leaving. Readers were disappearing. Everything I believed in crumbled into dust.

I fell into a true crisis. I would look in the mirror and see a person who might have lost everything.
"If you had stayed in your profession, everything would be stable now. A salary. A career. Respect. But look at you. You are sitting at a broken trough, having invested everything in creativity that nobody needs."

Yet I pushed the doubts aside, filmed videos, and ran ads.
Nothing helped.

Everyone who read my books had simply left the country. I felt like I was knocking on a silent concrete wall. I felt there was no way out and that I had made a mistake.
That was when I started watching series just to forget myself while writing my third novel.

Suddenly I realized that I wanted to write my own version of a soundtrack. My own vision. I had already practiced this in my second book. I wanted to convey that internal intensity that was missing.
I created a song. A Ukrainian track for a Thai series. I did the editing.
I did it for myself because it was so specific.

I had experience in music long before that. But nothing worked out back then. Doors kept closing.
Apparently, life had other plans for me. Apparently, I had to break first.
To find this.

When the track took off, I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe that I was heard. That my vision, my thoughts, my heart were heard and that people liked it.

I started creating in English. Then more. And more.
And it took off.

Did I plan this? God, no.
Am I happy? I cry from happiness.

Now there are more than 100,000 of you.
One hundred thousand souls who hear me. Who write to me that my music saved them in their darkest days. That they listen to my songs and feel that they are not alone.

You are my heart.
You gave me what diplomas, status, and a “proper profession” never could. You gave me proof that listening to yourself is not foolish.

Because of you, I am here.
This award is yours as much as it is mine. Because without you, this button would not exist.

But even now, choosing yourself is not easy.

In January of this year, my music was removed from all streaming platforms. In one single day.

A conflict with a distributor. I was slandered. They said I was inflating listener numbers.
That is a lie. A vile, dirty lie.

I did not do that. Every listener is a real person. Every stream is real.
And YouTube is proof of that.

You have to earn this silver button. It is not just about audience size. There are many criteria. They have their own strict checks.
If my listeners were fake, I would never have received it.

But I did.
And this button is not just an award.
It is proof to the whole world that I am real. That my listeners are real.
That you are real.

You are not numbers. You are people who heard and believed in a girl who chose her heart when her mind was screaming “no.”

Crises are inevitable. Falls are inevitable.
But I want to thank you for being with me. In moments of rise and in moments when I was breaking.
Especially now.

I will do everything I can to return all my music to where it belongs.
So that it is not only on YouTube.
But everywhere you can hear it

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2 months ago | [YT] | 788